Stressed out about terminating daycare clients? Terming a client can be one of the hardest and most stressful parts of running a home daycare.
No provider wants to have to term a family but there comes a time in every provider’s career where it is an unfortunate necessity.
Whether you are terminating daycare clients due to changes in how you run your business or because of issues with the parent/child, there are a few things about every daycare provider should know. Below you will find my tips for client termination, feel free to add yours in the comment section!
Tips for Terminating Daycare Clients
No matter how you approach a termination you can be sure that the parents will be upset. Whether it be sadness or anger, you will get some sort of emotional response from them.
Before you term, make sure you are doing these things beforehand:
- Document everything
- Communicate issues with parents
- Give warnings
Terminations that seem to come out of nowhere are usually met with significantly more anger and frustration. Especially if it is a family that you are having issues with.
This is why it’s so important that you are communicating with your clients from the beginning. Don’t ignore issues until they are out of control.
Less is more
The biggest thing to remember is to keep it short. You don’t need a novel about why the child doesn’t fit with your program, what the parents did that upset you, or why you have to change your program. The longer you make termination letters the more opportunities there are for issues to arise.
Never use another family as an excuse or say negative things about a child or parent. Keep it simple and to the point.
As daycare providers, we tend to get invested in our daycare families and form close connections. Many providers feel that this connection means that they owe their clients a long and thorough explanation.
However, that is not accurate.
You don’t owe them an explanation. If you’ve been communicating with parents about issues then they should be aware of why they are getting terminated. Obviously, if there is a pressing issue, like non-payment or gross misconduct by a parent, you can list the issue but generally, it’s best to just list the terms of the termination and nothing more.
A termination notice should be only a handful of sentences that informs the parents of their last day of care and if any deposit is applied or balances owed.
Put it in writing
Termination of care should always be given to the parent in writing.
Even if you plan to tell them verbally. Not only are you ending a contract (you should always have a signed daycare contract before providing care) but a written notice provides you with a paper trail for your records.
It also is a place to spell out what’s required of the parent.
Parents can get very upset when you terminate care and they are not always able to digest what is being said because of that anger. Giving them a written notice with all the details clearly laid out makes it harder for them to claim ignorance later.
While most terminations are planned beforehand there may be moments when you need to terminate care on the spot. If this happens, I immediately send them a termination notice via email. This way I have a written paper trail and parents have a hard copy to read through when they have calmed down.
Hand it directly to them
My policy has always been that I hand them the notice face-to-face. I hand them the written notice, give them a quick rundown, and then ask that they sign the form. Once they’ve signed it I email them over a copy for their records. In the event that they refuse to sign, I simply email them a copy so that I have documentation of the situation and a paper trail.
Here’s an example of how I bring it up to parents:
“I’m sorry to have to bring bad news to you today but I’ve made some changes to my program which means that I’m unfortunately I’m not going to be able to continue caring for (child) after (date). The details here for you in this notice, please sign the bottom of the notice and return to me. I have another copy for your records.”
A lot of providers prefer to do terminations via email rather than hand it directly to a client in person. They choose to email the notice during the middle of the day or evening hours. I understand that it is less stressful for some providers but I’ve found it just causes more problems that way.
Stay firm when terminating daycare clients
I think the hardest part for providers is the face-to-face moment when you have to deliver the news or hand the parent the notice.
It’s imperative that you stick to your plan. Don’t back down or let parents try to talk you out if it. If you are at the point of putting time and effort into drafting a letter of termination then you are done with that client.
Be prepared for parents to threaten to pull immediately or to not pay. This is very common in situations where you have been having issues with a family. I simply remind parents of the contract terms and offer to schedule another time to discuss when they have calmed down.
I won’t lie, it can be very hard to terminate a client. Especially the first one or two.
However, don’t let fear prevent you from doing it. If you hang on to families that don’t fit in your program you will end up stressed out and suffering from daycare provider burnout as a result.
This is your business, you can run it how you want and you don’t owe anything to anyone but yourself and your family.
Contact licensing after terminating care
This is a must if you’ve let a problem family go.
As sad is it makes me have to say this, there are many parents that will retaliate and try to cause an issue for the provider. The best preemptive step you can take it to document everything and notify your licensor of any termination immediately. Literally, as they pull out of the driveway you should be calling or emailing your licensor.
Sample termination letters
These are sample termination letters that people have submitted to me for review or that I have gotten from other providers over the years. They may cover different situations and give you an idea of how to approach termination letters.
“This letter serves as written two weeks notice of termination of child care services currently provided. The last date I will provide care for (child) is (date) and your remaining balance is for these remaining days of childcare is (amount owed). Please see me or refer to your contract if you have any questions. I have included the number to the local Child Care Resource and Referral if you should need assistance in finding new arrangements. I have enjoyed caring for (child) and I wish your family the best!”
“This notice is to inform you that child care services will be terminated in two weeks because at this time I am unable to continue offering child care services for your family. Your child’s last day of care will be (date). Your remaining balance for the last two weeks of care is (amount) and is due on (date).”
“This is written notice of my intent to discontinue our child care services agreement. At this time I am unable to provide (child) with the level of care he needs. The last day I will be able to provide care is (date). Thank you for allowing me to get to know your child and I wish you all the best.”
“I have enjoyed caring for (child) and getting to know your family but unfortunately at this time I am unable to continue providing child care services after (date). You’re remaining balance is (amount) and is due on (date). I wish your family the best!
“Due to [communication issues, unpaid child care fees, outstanding late fees] child care services are terminated effective immediately. Please understand this was a business decision and not personal in any way. Please make arrangements to pick up (child)’s belongings no later than (date).”
Make sure you include:
- How any deposits paid will be applied.
- What their remaining balance is.
- When the remaining balance is due.
- The last day they can pick up personal belongings.
- If they owe you money, quote your contract about late fees and unpaid balance collection.
I also always add the phone number to the local Child Care Resource and Referral Network to aid them in their search.
Terminating daycare clients is not easy but it is a necessary part of this career. With a little preparation and confidence, you can do it!
Just remember you are doing what’s best for you and your program. It’s a business decision and you have the right to make them as you see fit for your own business.
Good luck!
How do you handling terminating care?
Interested in learning more? Check out my tips for interviewing clients and tips on creating a contract. Doing home daycare and feeling stressed? Try my tips for avoiding getting burnt out or click the image above for more daycare advice and tips
I’m terminating a child today and I’m sweating bullets. I think I prefer working with infants and I have an infant lined up to take this child’s place.
Hope your termination was painless! They are never fun! Glad to hear that you already have someone lined up for the spot. That’s the perfect way to do it! 🙂
I know this was written almost a year ago but I just want to thank you for writing it! I started my in home daycare at the beginning of this year and unfortunately have to experience my first termination. In short the child requires more care than I am able to give him. I’m not looking forward to facing the parents but I just can’t do it anymore. Thanks again 🙂
Glad this was helpful! Terminations are tough! Especially that first one, I remember being a ball of nerves the first time. But sadly they are sometimes necessary. Just remember the stress that comes with the termination process is short lived, while the stress of dealing with a family/child that doesn’t fit is a long term daily stress. Good luck!
Thanks for writing this, after being opened for 5 years I’m doing my first termination. I have a set of twins who require more care then I’m able to give them. It’s tearing me apart but I must let go! Thanks again this article gave me the balls 🙂
Hi there,
I really enjoyed your post and I learned allot….
After many years of having a home daycare I am quite stressed with a new family .I do t know if I’m in the right to terminate ,my husband says I’m too sensitive and need to let things go.
I have a family who I started care for two monthes ago.
—-Never have the paid on time I have to remind them every two weeks that payment is past due.I feel horrible because I feel
I’m hounding then,I feel like I’m being so rude asking for the money
— Today is Saturday,my day off ,I receive a text from this same parent asking me how her son got a bruise 3 days ago.
I replied and said there was no major fall or I would have definitely told her! She replies back and says well! He keeps changing his story and I’m trying to figure it out .
I reply the bruise may have happened on one of my indoor or outdoor play structure. And that the children get many as their crawling all over them throughout the day!
She went on and on and on….
After a long conversation I stopped texting her I felt like I was been accused of something but I didn’t know what!
Finally,by late evening after I calmed down I texted and told her bruises will happen and I’m very sorry but not major happened to him here…she said I’ve got many different stories and I’m not accusing you but I need to know wether my son is telling me the truth!
After I told her I’ve never had a issue brought up by a parent like this and I’m feeling it’s not going to work out she sent a msg saying ohhh noooo Tammy it’s all a misunderstanding your taking it all wrong…
I didn’t mention to you that before all this happens she complained about the children’s sleeping arrangements and that I should be putting playpens all upstairs in my home so I wouldn’t have to go upstairs for the hour that the children sleep.i have two kids that don’t nap and the sleeping room is my playroom and so we go upstairs and play quietly with other toys and have some down time till babies are up.She didn’t like this aarangent as this isn’t part of my daycare!!!!
She says,”I just wanted to know the truth!”
And then she says….my daughters white shirts has stains and I can’t get them out so what markers exactly are you using?!
Omg! Am I overreacting??? Too sensitive???
I really truely need your help and fast!!!!
Thank you in advance!
Tammy
Hi Tammy! I totally understand your frustrations! The non-payment issue would definitely be something that I would address with them ASAP. I usually give repeat offenders a warning and then terminate if it continues, they also get charged a late payment fee. You shouldn’t have to chase down payment for your services. That adds so much extra stress, worrying every two weeks if you will get paid? Not okay. I’d term them for that alone honestly.
As for the texting, I have it in my contract that evenings and weekends are for family time. I do not respond to texts after hours. I ask that parent’s do not me on the weekends unless it is to let me know if their child will be out sick. I usually don’t respond or I will say something like “Out with my family right now, I will make a note and we can talk about it Monday morning. Thanks! Have a great weekend!” Don’t worry about the bruise, I’d just tell her that bumps and bruises happen but that you will keep an extra close eye on him. After that I don’t engage in the conversation anymore. The same for the marker comments, reply once and then that’s the end of it on your part. I’d say that I use regular washable markers, recommend she try spray and wash first, then ignore any additional comments about it.
If she keeps complaining about everything (usually it tapers off as they get used to you or as they realize you aren’t going to bend to their complaints) I’d definitely term. The non-payment issue is most concerning, that needs to be addressed and if they can’t pay on time terminate.
In a bit of a pickle, any advice welcome. I’ve been running my home daycare while waiting for my paperwork to be processed so I can receive my license to operate a home daycare. I currently have 2 full-time families, they both have three kids each. My state limit is 5 kids, which means one of the families has to go, but I’m unsure how to go about terminating care and who to let go….
Family A: a baby, and 2 toddlers. In care for more than a year. Pays on time. Hours/days care is needed fluctuate, M-S, inconsistent schedule.
FamilyB: 1 toddler, 2 school aged children. In care for 4 months. Pays late. Hours/days care is needed are ideal, M-F.
Please help…
Hi Dee! It can definitely be hard to have to decided between two families and that seems like a tough one! When I’ve had to make these decisions it usually comes down to two things for me: compatibility and schedules. Usually I follow my gut and pick families that I seem to connect with better and feel most comfortable with. It makes it much easier in the long term if you have a connection with them. Beyond that I look at schedules that fit best.
Between the two you have, based on what you provided, personally I’d probably lean towards Family B as I really like consistent schedules. If the family has three children that leaves you with two spots to fill. It’s so much harder to fill spots if one of your families doesn’t have a consistent schedule. Finding part time families that you can fit around inconsistent schedules can be very hard and can sometimes affect your income. Can you address the late payments with family B? Adding a late fee, if you are not already, is a great motivator for paying on time. However, if they continued to pay late I would term them as well and start fresh.
Thanks for sharing! I’ve been searching for two weeks for a sample and this is perfect!
I am doing my first termination right before my maternity leave. They pay on time, but drop off times are inconsistent and she gives me no text letting me know in advance. Despite me asking her too and it also is listed in my contract. That is very frustrating. She also switched her child to a vegan diet at 14 months and the food I have to cook for this child is ridiculous. She provides the food, all processed vegan food, and cook times and methods are long and obnoxious. She provides me hemp milk to give her 3 to 4 times a day with a bottle, but the hemp milk is in a very large, hard to pour, glass mason jar. I spill the milk with every pour. She takes vacations days, sick days, and gets a lot of holidays off and still drops her kid off (always super late with no courteosy text, I assume because she sleeps in) and picks up late or right at 5:00pm. She has lied to me too on a few occasions. I don’t even care to give this family any warnings anymore, I am just fed up with them. I honestly can’t wait to hand her my letter.
Hope your termination went well! What a tough client, I’d be done with them too! Things will be much easier for you soon!
Parents would need to provide all food, ready to eat, for a child with an allergy or special diet. As for the milk, should be serving that once a day at lunch. Instill a drop-off cutoff (mine is 9:30am) where they can’t come after that unless they have an appointment and submit proof to me at drop-off. Late pickup should have late fees ($15 for 1-10 minutes late then an additional $10/10 minutes late. so if 11 minutes late, would owe $25. hopefully that’s a motivator to be on time). And depending on the lies, that can be an immediate term if about masking illness or similar.
I wanted to say too, thank you for your blog and tips. I have been able to learn a lot from you! And my comment above, it is courtesy** I slaughtered that spelling above, lol!
how should i write a termination letter because the family wants to claim my daycare sevice and I was not expecting to file this extra income of daycare service
Hi Diane, I’m not sure if this was something you guys had arranged beforehand or not but unfortunately you should be claiming the business income on your taxes regardless. Parents have the option to claim the payment and most will choose to do this, even if they say they are not planning on it, which puts you in a tricky spot that could cause major problems with the IRS for you down the line if you have not claimed the income.
If you choose to terminate a family over this issue then I would simple give them a generic letter and keep it as vague as possible. I would just say you are making some changed to your program and no longer have the space. Good luck.